To the dogs of Montgomery, Alabama: please stop needing my assistance to keep you alive. I am emotionally exhausted and you seriously need to start taking care of yourselves. As I sit typing this, I have an elderly gentleman snoozing on the cushion to my left and a spritely young lad sleeping in his bed to my right, worn out from a wrestling match against me that took place several minutes ago. I have had the honor of watching these…
Dear 40-Year-Old Lizy, I sincerely hope you haven’t gained much weight. If you have, as many do when they are your age, I want to tell you that it is completely normal and I am sure you at least still have your awesome flexibility. If you don’t have your flexibility, I am disappointed in you and you need to get yourself to a dance studio. Hopefully your acne has cleared up by now, so there’s that. If your acne still…
I graduated college in December 2012 with a BA in Politics, which is my university’s way of saying “Political Science.” I mostly studied public opinion and a little bit of constitutional law. I am from California, studied in New York, and I am now an AmeriCorps member serving in Alabama. I get paid $12,100 for the year. I have an apartment that costs $455 a month, plus electricity. Half of my paycheck goes to rent. The rest goes to gas…
Having a tough time? Me too. But I’ve been moping a lot lately so my new tactic to get out of this rut is going to be to try and make you feel better. I’ve decided to start with the worst picture of me in existence, and put it as the icon for this post. Look at that mug; doesn’t it already make you feel better? Disclaimer: if you’re not having a tough time, this post might not make you…